No matter how brilliant the person may be, I have never met anyone with depressive illness who could acknowledge and accept their brilliance. Mental illness is an equal opportunity disorder that crosses all races and socioeconomic classes and affects the self esteem of those with the disorder. The ability of the disease to manipulate self doubt leaves many insecure in their talents and abilities. Worries and doubts about being a good parent can limit instinctual maternal abilities. Insecurities about parenting capabilities can be magnified by active symptoms of depressive illness which may also limit the ability to remain consistently emotionally available.

In my opinion, adults who have had the experience of limited and conditional love and attention as children have less self confidence and more insecurity. My message, therefore, is to make it your personal goal to achieve your best emotional stability. If you cannot be emotionally available when ill, plan to find a warm, loving and emotionally available person to help you co-parent. It may be your partner, a grandmother, a neighbor or your best friend. Just find someone who can be readily supportive of your child when your symptoms of illness make you become emotionally unavailable. In this way, you can limit the potential impact of your poor self esteem and avoid repeating the legacy of emotional distance from your child.