Motherhood often provides numerous lessons in flexibility, starting with the breast feeding choice. A few years ago, Jennifer Lopez made the cover of People Magazine after the birth of her twins. I appreciated her frankness concerning her decision to opt out of breast feeding. It appears she has bonded with her babies but decided it would be okay not to breast feed. She was quoted in the article as saying, "My mom didn't breast feed and I think that was the thing for me. You read and figure out what is the best for them."

Many of my patients feel that they must breast feed their babies. I have witnessed many patients struggling with their illness, attempting to breast feed, staying up all night, working the next day and not accepting treatment for their illness out of fear of an adverse effect on their baby. These women have great responsibilities as they balance newborns, families, and careers, often without extended families to help them. Yet they feel in order to be a good mother, breast feeding is their only option.

If you want to breast feed and it works for you, great! If not, and bottle feeding your baby is the best option, that's fine too. We have made mothers feel guilty about the bottle feeding choice. I have met many moms as they struggle with both severe emotional illness and trying to breast feed. Their inability to obtain restorative sleep and appropriate treatment magnifies their illness and inability to enjoy the early days of mothehood.

Hearing the message from Jennifer Lopez is gentle reminder that females have the ability to choose whether or not to breast feed.